Biggest mistakes divorcing women make

Hi, I am Lori Barkus, a family law attorney. My Colorado and South Florida-based law firm help women have a successful divorce. Today, I’d like to discuss the most significant mistakes divorcing women make. And this one comes up more often than you can even imagine. Women want to settle for too little in a divorce. There’s a desire to appease. There’s a lot of fear surrounding it, fear that their husbands will be mad, fear that other people will be mad. So there’s this desire to shrink back and say, “Okay, fine. I will accept this.” Or what sometimes happens with this process is that women go too far the other way and start fighting The biggest aggressively because they’re scared and not used to standing up for themselves. So they go completely 180 degrees the opposite. And that’s uncomfortable, especially when you’re not used to standing up for yourself.

And you often end up in the same place where you stop, you give up, and you say, “Okay, now I’ve fought, and I’ve spent all this money and energy, and everybody’s mad at me, and now I’m just gonna settle for the bad deal that I was trying to avoid.” And some people feel there’s no way out of these two situations. But here’s the thing, there is a middle ground. You don’t have to shrink back and agree to anything to keep the peace, especially if it’s unfair to you, because the goal is a fair resolution. You also don’t have to be super aggressive. Super aggressive does not work. The whole,” I want an aggressive divorce attorney. I need a pit bull.” Wow, I wouldn’t say I like that expression—all of those things, terrible, terrible ideas. The only thing you’re doing is feeding the divorce industry.

I’ll talk about that in another video. But super aggressive doesn’t work. What you can do is find the right partner and the right team and work with them to get a fair result. That’s what we do. We know how to get to a fair resolution, whether it’s a settlement or whether it’s trial. And we’re so well prepared that we rarely have to go to trial. We are the team that wants to partner with you to have a successful divorce if that’s what you’re facing. I would love to hear your comments and questions about this video. Feel free to go to Click on the contact us button and send us your thoughts. Thank you.

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