If life has taken you down an unexpected path, you don’t have to walk it alone.
What’s your Divorced New Years Resolution?
Part of going through a separation or divorce is shifting attention from the hurt of your past and focusing on future opportunities.
Focus on Forgiveness – You have probably experienced anger and/or blame towards yourself or your ex. Turn your focus on things that you are grateful for. Letting go of past grudges may make for a more peaceful year (Happiness might be the best revenge, after all).
Look Towards the Future – Create a vision of how you’d like your life to look in a year, two years, five years (post-covid, hopefully!) What will you be doing? Where will you travel? What hobby will you have learned?
Stay on Top of Finances – It is important to understand your spending, your debts, how to manage your savings, and your budget.
If you or someone you love is curious about divorce and how it may affect their families, please have them reach out at BarkusLaw.com. Wishing you all a Happy New Year!
Rebuild your Life after the End of a Relationship
Bob Manthy has been helping others rebuild their lives after the end of a relationship since his own divorce, noting that it was a necessary ending that led to new beginnings.
“I believed that if I could give everything and not have any needs, my partner would love and care for me. If things weren’t working out, I simply needed to give more and positively ensure I had no needs myself. We call that “over-responsible.” By being needless, I didn’t have to take the risk that they wouldn’t care for me, so I didn’t let them, even though I desperately wanted them to.”
Now, Bob helps so many others build new lives and new communities through their journeys. “Things are likely very, very hard during the process and it may seem like it will never end. But there is a new and most probably better life on the other side. A life with greater freedom to be yourself where your core gifts can shine.” Bob offers the following tips:
Focus on extraordinary self-care
Find your allies
Resist the temptation to isolate and lean on your community.
If you want to go fast, travel alone; if you want to go far, travel together.
Get the support you need to make good decisions for yourself (affecting the rest of your life), rather than speeding through the process.
You will be okay, no matter what happens.
Be open, vulnerable, and let people love you
You are enough, exactly as you are
His goals, like Lori’s are to be a steady guide for people going through divorce or separation, to help them move forward through difficult times. “Pairing a positive legal process with a positive emotional process is powerful support, and we’ve both helped many to a new beginning.”
Bob enjoys ultrarunning, backcountry skiing, hiking, climbing and traveling with his partner in their RV to beautiful places out west.
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